{I Miss You So Much More…Afterthoughts}

I mentioned that some posts may have some later thoughts added to them. Well, here’s the first one.

Shaylyn’s accident occurred on a Saturday, so the first full day spent at the hospital was a Sunday. That Sunday morning brought with it a snowstorm. It’s not unheard of for us to see snow in October, but it’s also not always the norm. I couldn’t help but think that Shaylyn would be mad she missed the first real snowstorm of the season and it made me a little sad.

Eric and I decided to have lunch in the cafeteria. Really neither one of us ate much, but we got enough in our systems to function somewhat. While walking to the cafeteria I just remember being so cold. A feeling I’d have throughout the month. Looking back now, I was probably in shock.

The cafeteria seemed a dismal, gloomy place. Because it was a Sunday, it wasn’t all that busy. Also, Covid kept hospital visitors down. They were doing work outside the hospital cafeteria – making a courtyard or something similar and I just kept wishing it was warmer weather and that the courtyard was actually done because I needed the sun.

All around the cafeteria there is positive signage. Famous sayings like:

“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, its about learning how to dance in the rain.”

There would be days I’d hate seeing them because there seemed to be nothing good going on, but there were also days where they were just what I needed to see.

My little sister called while we were eating that first afternoon. She didn’t want to bother us but had some questions about things happening back at home. I was happy to have the distraction though it was hard to talk to her and make decisions about the other kids and everyday life. I just kept thinking, “How is this my life right now?”

I was thankful for my mom and sisters. They jumped right in and took care of things at home. While at our home they had a prayer with the kids. My sister would later tell me that after this prayer Lex would say, “When I saw the snow this morning, I took it as a sign. Shaylyn will be okay.”

Shaylyn has loved the snow since she was little. She’s always been eager to get out there and build a snowman and as she got older a snow fort. I was always amazed at how long she could stay in the snow, even as a little girl.

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